Friday, August 8, 2014

It’s About Time



It’s time for a new health aid to become fashionable. Many have made the leap, but one lingers…

Glasses are very fashionable, and the more you spend on them, the more fashionable they become. Make sure the logo is huge too. Soon I predict the logos will cover the entire lenses.

Braces – once a public admission that your parents wanted to socially torture you by chroming your mouth – are now sought after. In a cruel twist, parents are being begged for braces, stumped for plausible responses. “Oh honey, you look fine. Here’s some anchor rope so you can floss.”

Hats are mostly to shield the sun or keep your head from freezing like a butterball turkey in winter. Then there’s this genius who chose style over function… 

If only there was a hat that could shield your eyes.
Now I proclaim Hearing Aids as the next fashion statement. Especially since I just got a pair. (Of hearing aids. I heard that.) In fact, I hear EVERYTHING now. Once the Fashionista at the Hearing Aid place programmed them, I started hearing conversations on distant planets, so I had her adjust them down to where I could only hear a butterfly burp at 50 paces.

But I never expected this…

Whenever you say “What?” more than 40 times per hour, it’s time to get your hearing checked. And one of three things will happen: a) You’ll emerge needing hearing aids, b) They discover a trout lodged in each ear or c) You’ll wander out in denial, unaware that the staff is screaming for you to pay your bill.

I chose ‘a,’ since I’ve already been through versions of the other two. And man, what a difference.

I didn’t know what I’d been missing.

I no longer have to study the lip movements in movies in an attempt to determine whether I’m watching a romantic comedy or a horror movie. (Often, the same thing.) I don’t laugh in a group because other people are laughing. (I have now discovered how often they were laughing at me!)

I can now hear my wife when she whispers. I can hear my daughter even when I’m not looking at her. Once my wife asked, “Did you ever go pick some basil for dinner?” yet I was POSITIVE she’d said, “Does it ever snow when you pick your nasal in winter?” I stared at her for 15 seconds.

NOTE: My particular hearing problem was mostly that I couldn’t hear the pitch where females speak. (This came in super handy sometimes. For reference, these can be turned OFF as desired.)

Far as how they ‘look’; I don’t care. I can hear. And for those who notice the discreet wire, I begin to speak into my lapel and look around suspiciously. These things are smart too. They ‘talk’ to each other and filter out harsh sounds, such as “Where do I send the bill?” while being able to pick up the discussion of Crème Brûlée from 4 tables over.

I didn’t know what I’d been missing.

And so it is with many things. We “dull” ourselves to how far we’ve slipped. It’s gradual, nothing major, but when you look back, it becomes glaringly obvious.  Those 5 pounds a year add up. The 10-12 cigarettes a day put nearly 4,000 on your lips a year. And the business that isn’t getting a “tiny” 3 leads a day is losing 1,000 leads a year.

If your website was super-hot in 2008 but remains unchanged, it is prehistoric. If you thought “I really don’t lose customers” but don’t have a program in place, you lose 11% of those customers a year and all the referrals with them.

If you wonder why your marketing seems to have “fallen on deaf ears,” it’s probably time for a checkup. Things have changed, friends. People, finances, the economy, media and even how people buy… it has all changed.

Learn what you’ve been missing.

We’re giving away MAPs (Marketing Assessment Plans) during the FIRST TEN DAYS OF AUGUST ONLY. They take you a few minutes to complete, and it takes us hours to compile your unique marketing assessment. (Coaches can only accept 40 total requests, so it would be wise to complete yours soon.)

There’s nothing ‘sold’ in these assessments. So what do we get? We compile mountains of research, benchmarks and norms that help us in our global contractor marketing applications. You will get actual baselines for contractor norms, along with many suggestions on improving your marketing performance.  Just go here to fill yours out.

And remember, the next time we meet at a seminar, I can hear what you’re thinking.

Adams Hudson