Happy Old Year!
Every year for 28 in a row, my dear
wife and I have had a New Year’s Eve Dinner, almost every time at home. (This
year, we’re breaking that tradition for a family vacation.) Though I’m
decidedly not a creature of habit –
though she is -) we have the same format, and for the last 15 years the same
meal:
Osso buco, risotto, plus something
liquid and red to complete the Italian pretense. I get hungry just writing the
words. The format is: a) what we did in the previous year and b) goals for the
coming year. A more revealing discussion is: c) What we accomplished from the previous year’s goals. Aha!
To keep that last part from making
me look like, “Mr. Dreamer Gets an F in Accomplishment,” my goal list has
gotten more focused, more selective. (I dropped ‘Learn a second language’ and
‘Become dizzyingly tall’ a few years back.) Each year, we’re amazed at what
happened, blessings bestowed, lives touched. Stuff crossed off the list.
In that time, we noticed a pattern
that is contrary to what ‘most’ will tell you about accomplishment, though many
have hinted. And we hit a goal this year I would’ve never, ever, thought
reasonable. Let me encourage you to “do this and DO NOT do this…”
Using an old but reliable
goal-setting model, we break them down into ‘business, personal, health,
spiritual’. I lobbied to add a subcategory called, “Awesome cars and firearms”
but my wife deemed that inappropriate. Yet there was a pattern that emerged of
the ‘done’ and ‘undone’ list:
Many ‘done’ ones happened in one of two fairly odd, inexplicable ways.
Either
it just ‘happened’ as in circumstances lined up, people appeared and out of the
blue (which we know is not true) situations aligned for their attainment. The
serious experts in goal-setting will tell you, “When you put it down, talk
about it, imagine it, it becomes real at
that point.” Then, appearance is just an evolution, a manifestation from that
seed. Seriously. I believe it.
Or,
this happened –
After discussion, we’d make a move as if had happened. “As ifs” are very
important. Then, an odd set of events would conspire to bring about reality. (I
believe God knows what gifts are right for us, material or spiritual, way
before we do!) One example:
We started ‘looking’ at lake houses long
before we could afford a second home. We’d talk of styles, size, the view, you
know, “just dreaming.” Before we knew it, we had a very patient realtor and a
price range (though far below what it would take to get our inflated house idea
to reality).
One night, we visited a friend’s house
on a completely different part of the lake from where we’d looked before,
and it had a very different topography. My wife and I looked out of the window
of their gorgeous home and almost cried. It was a view we’d only seen in our
minds. Our friend stepped over, noticing our jaws dropped, and began talking
about how she too cherished this view.
She said, “You know, the lot next
door is for sale, right?” Well, of course, we didn’t! And after we spoke to the
realtor, it wasn’t for long. See, our price range was not close to enough for
the house we’d imagined, but was perfect for a great lot. Those wheels were set
in motion, and not long after, we began building the house we’d envisioned. We’ve
since spent 7 great summers there with our kids, their friends, our friends,
family, building cherished memories each time. None of this would’ve happened
without a goal, a dream.
I encourage you to take your “Dream
List” for 2014, share it with someone you love a whole lot, and watch what
happens for you. Pick a couple items and make a move “As if” it were real. As if your business doubled this year; as if your family discord was resolved; as if your teenager became human again.
Stranger things have happened.
WHEN – not if – you tell me what
miracles came your way, I will be joyous, but not surprised!
Recently
this got to me –
As is likely with you, we had a “goal”
to eventually get free of debt. You know, education debt, car debt, house debt,
all those things that bother men and
women, disallowing full freedom of thought. I know you occasionally awaken with
thoughts of “One day I’ll be able to…” The wall between today and “one day” for
me seemed often to be debt-related.
Not any more.
Amazingly, we will retire our final debt
– a mortgage payment - next week. Done. Over. Debt-free. A series of events
just seemed to happen. (Right.) And
since I’m a goofball, I plan to retire it quite ceremoniously, inserting the paid
document inside the newel post of the stair, topping it with a ‘mortgage
button’ I gave my wife for Christmas. (Googling ‘mortgage buttons’ will explain
this oddity if you’re unfamiliar, as I was.)
Interestingly, his stair is located
in the lake house, where we just moved full-time. The thing that caused me such
indebtedness has now become an instrument of freedom. New Year’s dinner this
year will be unlike any before.
In truth, they are all unlike any
previous! (If your years are starting to repeat themselves, then something is
wrong!) Look at your 2014 as “The year you finally….” And put those wheels in
motion. It’ll happen. Let me encourage you, here and now, this is your year,
friend, I just know it.
Think of what would bring you joy.
What would bring you freedom? What would allow that feeling of accomplishment
to come alive in you? You are more than you’ve been. Don’t let ‘potential’ die
inside you; share it with the world. It’s your time.
Tell me what YOU want to accomplish
in 2014. I want you to look back in a year and say, “HAPPY OLD YEAR!” with an
equal sense of accomplishment and gratitude. Respond here. (If
personal, I PROMISE not to republish. I just want to put all of you on the
“Wish and a Prayer List.”)
Wishing you and yours a successful
New Year,
Adams Hudson
1 comment:
Good article Adams. My wife and I had similar "past accomplishments/future goals" conversations during the holidays. Very constructive and therapeutic time together.
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