Thursday, January 2, 2014

Does This Happen to You?


Happy Old Year!

Every year for 28 in a row, my dear wife and I have had a New Year’s Eve Dinner, almost every time at home. (This year, we’re breaking that tradition for a family vacation.) Though I’m decidedly not a creature of habit – though she is -) we have the same format, and for the last 15 years the same meal:

Osso buco, risotto, plus something liquid and red to complete the Italian pretense. I get hungry just writing the words. The format is: a) what we did in the previous year and b) goals for the coming year. A more revealing discussion is: c) What we accomplished from the previous year’s goals. Aha!

To keep that last part from making me look like, “Mr. Dreamer Gets an F in Accomplishment,” my goal list has gotten more focused, more selective. (I dropped ‘Learn a second language’ and ‘Become dizzyingly tall’ a few years back.) Each year, we’re amazed at what happened, blessings bestowed, lives touched. Stuff crossed off the list.

In that time, we noticed a pattern that is contrary to what ‘most’ will tell you about accomplishment, though many have hinted. And we hit a goal this year I would’ve never, ever, thought reasonable. Let me encourage you to “do this and DO NOT do this…”

Using an old but reliable goal-setting model, we break them down into ‘business, personal, health, spiritual’. I lobbied to add a subcategory called, “Awesome cars and firearms” but my wife deemed that inappropriate. Yet there was a pattern that emerged of the ‘done’ and ‘undone’ list:

Many ‘done’ ones happened in one of two fairly odd, inexplicable ways.  

Either it just ‘happened’ as in circumstances lined up, people appeared and out of the blue (which we know is not true) situations aligned for their attainment. The serious experts in goal-setting will tell you, “When you put it down, talk about it, imagine it, it becomes real at that point.” Then, appearance is just an evolution, a manifestation from that seed. Seriously. I believe it.

Or, this happened –

After discussion, we’d make a move as if had happened. “As ifs” are very important. Then, an odd set of events would conspire to bring about reality. (I believe God knows what gifts are right for us, material or spiritual, way before we do!) One example:

We started ‘looking’ at lake houses long before we could afford a second home. We’d talk of styles, size, the view, you know, “just dreaming.” Before we knew it, we had a very patient realtor and a price range (though far below what it would take to get our inflated house idea to reality).

One night, we visited a friend’s house on a completely different part of the lake from where we’d looked before, and it had a very different topography. My wife and I looked out of the window of their gorgeous home and almost cried. It was a view we’d only seen in our minds. Our friend stepped over, noticing our jaws dropped, and began talking about how she too cherished this view.

She said, “You know, the lot next door is for sale, right?” Well, of course, we didn’t! And after we spoke to the realtor, it wasn’t for long. See, our price range was not close to enough for the house we’d imagined, but was perfect for a great lot. Those wheels were set in motion, and not long after, we began building the house we’d envisioned. We’ve since spent 7 great summers there with our kids, their friends, our friends, family, building cherished memories each time. None of this would’ve happened without a goal, a dream.

I encourage you to take your “Dream List” for 2014, share it with someone you love a whole lot, and watch what happens for you. Pick a couple items and make a move “As if” it were real. As if your business doubled this year; as if your family discord was resolved; as if your teenager became human again. Stranger things have happened.

WHEN – not if – you tell me what miracles came your way, I will be joyous, but not surprised!

Recently this got to me

As is likely with you, we had a “goal” to eventually get free of debt. You know, education debt, car debt, house debt, all those things that bother men and women, disallowing full freedom of thought. I know you occasionally awaken with thoughts of “One day I’ll be able to…” The wall between today and “one day” for me seemed often to be debt-related.

Not any more.

Amazingly, we will retire our final debt – a mortgage payment - next week. Done. Over. Debt-free. A series of events just seemed to happen. (Right.)  And since I’m a goofball, I plan to retire it quite ceremoniously, inserting the paid document inside the newel post of the stair, topping it with a ‘mortgage button’ I gave my wife for Christmas. (Googling ‘mortgage buttons’ will explain this oddity if you’re unfamiliar, as I was.)

Interestingly, his stair is located in the lake house, where we just moved full-time. The thing that caused me such indebtedness has now become an instrument of freedom. New Year’s dinner this year will be unlike any before.

In truth, they are all unlike any previous! (If your years are starting to repeat themselves, then something is wrong!) Look at your 2014 as “The year you finally….” And put those wheels in motion. It’ll happen. Let me encourage you, here and now, this is your year, friend, I just know it.

Think of what would bring you joy. What would bring you freedom? What would allow that feeling of accomplishment to come alive in you? You are more than you’ve been. Don’t let ‘potential’ die inside you; share it with the world. It’s your time.

Tell me what YOU want to accomplish in 2014. I want you to look back in a year and say, “HAPPY OLD YEAR!” with an equal sense of accomplishment and gratitude.  Respond here. (If personal, I PROMISE not to republish. I just want to put all of you on the “Wish and a Prayer List.”)

Wishing you and yours a successful New Year,

Adams Hudson

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Good article Adams. My wife and I had similar "past accomplishments/future goals" conversations during the holidays. Very constructive and therapeutic time together.